I Love A Good Magic Fight!

If you’ve got a few minutes read this thread:

http://geniimagazine.com/forum/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=10;t=001794;p=1

I haven’t dug too deeply into it, but basically it’s all about Rings and Things 2. They have their defenders and their detractors. Maybe somebody is right. I don’t know.

Anyway, the thread gets going pretty good and Marcella Zimmerman, the main guru at RNT2 logs in and begins to kick ass and take names.

I tell you, she pulls out the virtual shillelagh and starts swinging. What I enjoyed most is she drove head on into some of the Cafe’ insiders that are used to hiding behind Brooks’ enormous bulk and she spews testicles all over the Genii forum. I appreciate Kaufman letting this type of thing run. It’s only fair*.

It’s down to a slow smolder now and may not see more posts, but it was fun while it lasted.

Take care………

* For the Cafe’ Gestapo:

fair (fâr) characterized by honesty and justice : free from self-interest, deception, injustice, or favoritism




Cleaning the desk

I’m working on some longer things, but these are just random dumps for your consideration:

i/m in Blogland

  • Blogs are kinda slow these days. Seems to be a sign of the times. I guess we’re all more concerned with paying for gas and heating our homes. Don’t worry, your crack Federal Government is on the case.
  • Magician X continues to be the best writer with a currently active blog. He seems to have his hand in his pants a little too often for this old man, but I imagine he thinks I have my head up my ass too often for his taste. Obviously well educated and insightful. Frequently updated.
  • Tim Ellis posts regularly and his blog is worth your consideration.
  • MagicCentric must be spending his time trying to run down his lost kajonies after being neutered in the Haydn fiasco. I’m questioning whether he will ever come back. The last substantive post was on how to spell his name – and they say blogs are dull! His other blog – Atom something seems dead.
  • I enjoy both Tom Frank’s blog and The Magic Whack, but neither offer an RSS feed, so I seldom see them. C’mon fellers – that’s just silly. Likewise Euan Bingham.
  • Glenn Bishop tends to post in spurts, but it’s worth watching. He has some really good ideas.

I don’t understand Google

I’ve added Google AdWords to the site. Hey, if I can make a few pennies with little harm – that’s OK. AdWords supposedly reads the page and decides on what ads would be appropriate. On this page are ten articles. The Google spider persists in picking up on the couple of paragraphs regarding shoes for cross dressing men and putting ads for large size women’s shoes at the top.

One last Haydn comment

Whit Just Won’t Catch On

Unfortunately, I can’t exactly quote Hopalong Haydn here, because the Storm Troopers at Stalag Brooks deleted the entire thread about the 3 shell manuscript etc. etc. etc. etc………….

Somewhere in there Haydn AGAIN makes the mistake of saying he was reviled in the anonymous blogs for defending his friend Stephen F. Youell – he of the Bible citation email address – Sheesh!!! He must be a real holy man.

I don’t know why this is so damn difficult for him to absorb. He can perform unnatural acts with Youell 24/7 – buy billboards proclaiming how wonderful he is – name a star after him – whatever he wants. Please tell the world what a magnanimous, caring, misunderstood gentlemen he is. Feel free. I don’t give a fuck and neither does anybody else. That’s a fact. There’s actually real merit in defending a friend through thick and thin.

What is so damn irritating and unfair is Haydn virtually strutted around the Cafe, acting like some big time bad ass, knowing full well that anyone disagreeing with him would get sat on by Brooks’ ample ass. In short he was a bully. He deserves absolutely no quarter for any repurcussions arising from those actions. Absolutely none!

P.S. The article on the genesis of Whit’s name in the October Magic is worth a read.

Take care………

Drivel & Drool

Who are these people and why are they running my country?!

I guess I might as well admit it – I HATE GEORGE F. BUSH.

I’m a lifelong Republican – errrr, make that Conservative. Something G2 professes to be. Barry Goldwater must be twisting in his grave. In some respects I guess G2 is not particularly worse than many of his predecessors, but I expected more. In retrospect, that was naive. I had read his father’s lying lips as he was going to make provisions for our retirement and less reliance on Social Security – sound familiar? That lasted 1 year before he caved in and repealed the law. If you ever heard G1 talk about it, it wasn’t the fact that he broke a firm promise that bothered him, but that he made the promise in a way people remembered it.

Now I hear G2 tell us he never said imminent when talking about the Iraqi threat. That may well be true, but the clear thrust for going into Iraq was the present danger they represented. George!! Listen up!! The next time you want to play word games, make it about getting a blow job in the Oval Office and not bankrupting our country on a wild goose chase. Hell, they couldn’t even get one plane in the air. What a big time threat they were! And….. you have the balls to say you would not have changed a thing if you knew all of these facts. Maybe you are as dumb as some people portray you.

Now we’re asked to sacrifice due to the hurricanes and the energy issues. What about your fucking buddies in the oil industry! George, you’re nominally the President. You could do something!

Make no mistake – big corporations, the most corrupt institutions in the galaxy, own this administration and I fear they are striking the final blow to this formerly great country as we speak.

It is said by some, George, that you feel you are on a crusade. If that crusade was other than destroy this country, you have failed. Our future generations will pay for your malfeasance and sheer incompetence.

Nice legacy……..

Prepare for President Hillary!

I think I’m going to be ill – very ill.




Does anyone care anymore?

This was in the Denny & Lee Newsletter yesterday. I think many of us know the answer and it’s ugly. For your consideration:

We just started our lecture schedule up again for the fall and I must say, I am very disappointed at the interest in lecturers. Below is a list of great lectures and it just seems that no one seems to care anymore. It is getting more and more difficult to get magicians away from their computers, plasma screens, DVD players, and instant magic downloads from unethical websites. Magic events are poorly attended, magic shops get no more visitors, and live lectures seem to be a thing of the past.

If you look at the magic on TV today and the magic that is being performed, it all seems to be highly edited, almost “unreal” and definitely not able to be performed in “real life” situations. I wonder where the young magicians of today will be in the next few years.

I go through a great effort (in both time and money) to bring these fine lecturers to our studio and the apathy makes me wonder if it is really worth the effort.

One of the most disappointing statements is “Well, I never heard of him.” Guess what??? Somewhere in the world is the greatest plumber who ever lived and if you’re not a professional plumber, then you will have never heard of him. It’s the same with magic. It seems like the only reservations coming in are for the Mark Wilson lecture which is almost sold out.

Below is the current schedule of lecturers coming up in the next three months. Our first one is coming up in three more days and currently we have only three people signed up for this Award Winner. This will most likely be your only chance to ever see him lecture. Oh well, the world is changing, and maybe I should learn to change also. I hope not.

Drivel & Drool

The Cafe’ continues to push the bar higher and higher when it comes to raw stupidity.

Bill Palmer started a thread regarding an eBay auction that he felt was misleading / overpriced. The thread is here. Personally, I think there are worse things on eBay, but that’s not the point.

The Cafe’ gestapo removed the link. What could possibly be the purpose? It seems they are personally out to disenfranchise one and all. Actually, I was surprised to see them step on one of the more visible names.




So You Want To Be An Illusionist?!

I’ll admit a prejudice against what magicians call illusions:

  • Most guys dancing around, pointing, strutting and posing while someone else does the work just look ridiculous.
  • Every performer that wants to add an illusion to his act so he can demand more money, seems to, invariably, go out and buy some rickety Super-X and proceeds to fool no one. The only audience interest is hoping the assistant doesn’t fall off as she sways back and forth like a Jack-In-The-Box.
  • So often the acts look like they haven’t bothered to rehearse.
  • I’m seldom fooled by the tricks, even though I’ve never studied illusions.

Recently I had the opportunity to attend a lecture by a 1st class illusionist and came away with a new appreciation for some of them:

  • That stuff is heavy and hauling it around and setting up is a lot of work
  • The magician doesn’t have to look like an escapee from The Pink Dildo
  • Good props are very expensive, but the end product shows well. Very well.
  • A good assistant is probably better trained than the magician. He exposed the Mismade Girl and the work that must be accomplished in a small space and in seconds is unbelievable.
  • A good illusionists must spend a lot of time deciding what works for his act and not just buy a fancy colored box to prance around.

I could never be an illusionist. Actually, I could never afford it, but that aside, it’s just not me. I will, however, have a much greater appreciation for the performers the next time I see a good illusionist.

Drivel & Drool

More Cafe’ posts I won’t read:

I know some super secret, inside shit that you don’t – D. Watkins

Tomorrow – i/m Drops the E Bomb!




How To Float With Sexy Shoes

I use Google as my home page. It’s fast, reliable and easily customizable.

One of the items I get is the “How To” Tip Of The Day. Some of the stuff is kinda helpful. Yesterday was a popular article on how to remove scratches from CDs. Be careful taking advice, as it is nothing more than a Wiki, which means any fool with a computer can offer advice.

Anyway, recently it had How To Perform The Balducci Levitation. The description was so-so, but I believe anyone could learn it from the description. You think magic isn’t popular? It’s had about 50,000 hits to date.

ehow.com is supported by Google ads. Basically, Google reads the page and then places appropriate ads on the right side. This ad on the Balducci page caught my eye:

All Heels For Men will help you make the most of your feminine side! We offer a large selection of the sexiest heels, slippers, boots and stockings to make your legs look ladylike and alluring. We specialize in only sizes 9-17 especially for the transgendered man! Our retail store will be happy to take your order by phone at 954-748-5855 between the hours of 11am-9pm Eastern Time. We ship worldwide and rush orders are available upon request.

All Heels For Men is the web’s number one source for large-sized sexy shoes. If you are a crossdressing man who has a hard time finding the feminine shoes you love in large, hard to find sizes, your search is over! We have been serving the transgendered community for over ten years, and we look forward to serving you. Remember, refer to our size chart, or add two sizes to your male shoe size in order to find your female shoe size. Special requests are always welcome, and we will do our best to find just what your fantasy desires. Please email or call us!

Since the ads rotate with each access, you may or may not see this. Computer logic isn’t always perfect. Then again…….

Drivel & Drool

Another Report From Douche Bag Central……

Once again, an aristocratic, pompous ands unfair reply from the Cafe staffers (minor editing for readability):

———————————————————–

Honest question posed: I have a friend who wants to sign up to the Café. BUt he is using a free email from yahoo. He got a message stating that free emails are blocked on this forum.

Is there a reason for doing so? There are so many people using free emails such as yahoo or hotmail. WHy prevent them from entering the Café?

Another user chimes in: My youngest son wanted to join recently, as he is interested in magic. He was disheartened and I was shocked that he was not allowed in because he doesn’t have money to be able to afford an email account other than the free one.

Cafe developer with basic Cafe Fuck Off Answer: I can assure you there are very valid reasons for it, but I’m not going to explain them here.

Suffice to say if you ever run your own board of this size, you may eventually decide to do the very same thing, perhaps even for the very same reasons. Even if you didn’t, you’d clearly understand why it’s being done here.

Groveling user with every bone in his body wanting to suggest that developer perform unholy act with computer, but refrains due to Cafe policies: Gene, I don’t mean to be disrespectful, or even contrary, but I don’t think I’d ever block some one from coming on board on the basis of their being poor.

Case in point? My son.

———————————————————–

There’s no earthly reason for this approach except abuse. None. The answer wouldn’t have taken a minute. The real question here is does Brooks hire pompous, intolerable douche bags are does he train them in his own image?

If anyone reading this has this email problem, ask one of your computer savvy friends. It’s a very, very minor hurdle. There are hundreds of log ons available in the “underground”. Just hunt around.

Once again, we award the i/m Platinum Jackass to the Magic Cafe’ and its predicatable staff




Freebie That’s Actually Worth Something

Yesterday, the October Genii arrived. For those of us that have subscribed since the Bill Larsen days, the first instinct is to say “which year?”. Since Richard Kaufman has taken over, the publication schedule has been met with boring consistency. The magazine seems to be back on track, actually having magic in it, after going through a period when it had as much magic as the New Yorker. I look forward to its arrival every month.

Included in the poly bag was a demo DVD from L&L. Included on the DVD are over 20 performances from their DVD stable and two full explanations, Mike Close’s wonderful Dr. Strangetrick and the Larry Jennings’ self-worker Impossible. The choice of tricks to explain is excellent. I’ve always considered the Close version of Card Warp to be the best and Larry’s location trick is inexplicable.

The performances from prior DVDs, generally, are very good. A couple, like Flip’s rope trick, are painfully obvious to any but the most magically challenged.

In recent months I’ve begun to find the L&L DVDs tiresome on many fronts – the audience, the choice of performers and too little magic on too many DVDs. Also, they were advertising well in advance of actual shipment, with no indication that the product wasn’t actually ready.

The recent set, starring Joshua Jay, shows improvements in all of these areas. I hope it continues.

Drivel & Drool

The latest from Stalag Brooks

Sometimes I feel bad about beating up on the Cafe’, but then reality sets in and I know that what they do must be exposed.

Here’s a classic example, written by a long time user and genuinely helpful poster with close to 1,000 posts. You’ll never see it, as it was deleted within a couple of hours:

Thank you, Magic Café, for deleting my posts in this thread. I’m only a long time member (four years) and obviously don’t deserve at least a short message about the WHY behind this kind of censorship. It’s getting better and better here.

Isn’t that pathetic? Don’t let me hear any of that bull shit about it’s his site and he can do as he pleases. There’s right and there’s wrong and this is W-R-O-N-G.